Tuesday, April 28, 2009

Things To Do With A Goose

I have been thinking. I have been known to be rather bitter towards the feathered bird known as the goose. Yes, I have lost an iPod to a goose and yes I feel that they stalk me. While they seem to really be a menace to society, I have found that there are quite a few GOOD things that can come out of the goose population. Who knew? Most of them do involve the goose being dead but that is not my fault. So I would like to dedicate this post to THIS goose....the one that is sitting her fat butt on what is sure to be more little spawns of the devil more feathered friends in time to come. This is the goose that lives in my office parking lot. I hate her.


Bear with me as this may get a little lengthy....I had no clue that there were so many FUN things to do with geese.

First off we have the obvious.....goose outfits. Now I do think it may be a little difficult to get my office goose into an outfit (unless it is dead) but still there is much fun to be had with goose clothes. I feel THIS is most representative of their little birdy personalities.

My Mother in Law enjoys dressing her goose. I want to kick it every time I go to her house but I don't want to break my foot. Actually I also want to kick the office goose but I fear the security cameras would catch me.

Did you know that almost ALL parts of the goose can be used for something fabulous? Look at these pillows filled with goose down. Don't you just want to curl up on them and dream of geese being hit by semi trucks? I know I do.

Something else that is cool to do with goose feathers--dress up clothes. I know that if Mallory had a goose feather boa I would smile with glee every time she played with it. I would know that somewhere there was either a dead or bald goose that gave up it's feathers for my daughters enjoyment.

Even the EGGS of the goose are full of potential!! Look at this beautiful Christmas ornament made out of a goose egg. I would LOVE to hang it on my tree....every year I could think of the goose that did NOT hatch out of this egg.

Now let's talk about some of the awesome ways to EAT a goose. Tired of turkey at Thanksgiving? Feast your eyes upon this.What a tasty reminder that the only good goose is a dead one. How easy to make! All that you need is 1 goose breast, skinned and boned (2 fillets), 1/2 cup wine vinegar, 1/4 cup vegetable oil, 1/4 cup soy sauce, 1/4 teaspoon freshly ground pepper, SAUCE: 1/4 cup currant jelly, 1/4 cup water,1-1/2 tablespoons Dijon mustard, 1 teaspoon lemon juice, 1 teaspoon soy sauce, 1/2 teaspoon steak sauce, salt, fresh-ground black pepper to taste--I have most of these ingredients at home and I can get the goose the way to my car.

In a zip-seal plastic bag, combine vinegar, soy sauce, vegetable oil and pepper. Add goose fillets, and allow to marinate 2 1/2 hours, turning often. Broil for 10 minutes on each side and VOILA....dinner is served.

A 3.5oz serving of roasted goose breast has 25g of protein!!

Having a party? Don't serve boring old cheese and crackers. Serve Goose Liver Pate and be all the talk of the town.

If all of this goose awesomeness has not convinced you that geese are our friends then I will leave you with this........The AwayWithGeese Unit.

From the products website........The success of the product is based around a simple concept. At night, geese sleep in areas where they feel secure from their predictors, such as dogs, fox and coyotes. (And jaded attack victims) Placing an AwayWithGeese unit into these areas disrupts the geese's ability to sleep, and they simply move to another safe area within a few days.

I hope you have learned something from all of this information. I know I have. That said....I still hope to accidentally run over the office goose today after work. I need a new pillow.

29 people fed my need for attention:

Sally's World

LOL what a brilliant post...are these creatures prone to stalking????

Mommy of M's

Wow, your goose obsession amazes me!

Aileigh

Love this post! Your wittiness never ceases to amaze me! I think I will pass on the pate! :)

Martha

Thanks for the funny. Love the goose sleep disturber.

geminigrl24

This is absolutely hilarious!

Kristina P.

I love the way you put it all into perspective.

Kat

I personally hate pigeons more than geese. Frackin rats with wings I tell ya!

Bre

You are INSANE, my love!

Jodi

So how long before 10 "Away with Goose" units are found randomly placed around the SF parking lot?

Dani

Haha! Oh and remember goose feet are actually eatable too! Chewy!

Windi

Ha Ha Ha!!! Your so funny! I really enjoyed this post and your kids are so cute! Glad to hear they are just like mine! Hitting and screaming, oh yes!! Mine all the way baby!!! Thanks for visiting my blog and commenting. I appreciate it! ;)

Jim Brochowski

I'm telling ya - all you need is a 4 iron. You can throw it at the goose and then blame it on some hack golfer practicing his swing in the parking lot at lunch time.

I've thought of you a couple times when I've seen geese out and about. Hmmm... might have to start taking some pics.

Good stuff!

Ginger

I am cracking up!! I was walking my dog yesterday and a goose came out of no where and starting to dive bomb us!! I took off running and realized I was literally dragging my dog behind me. He was more interested in getting the goose!! Finally, somebody took pity on me and came to my rescue. This post just really made me laugh!! I needed the laugh, it has been one of "those" days dealing with my 17 year old son! Thank you for sharing.

The Wife O Riley

Don't forget a nice goose to your bottom (from the right person that is)

Becky

geese scare me, once I was chased down by a HUGE one while walking at a park, now I cower in fear everytime one is near.....

i am the diva

woah, i had no idea that when i came here i held the fate of Tinker Bell in my hands...

We had a "pet" goose growing up. It attacked cars and lamp posts. it was a stupid goose.

jineen

i fully support your rid the world of geese efforts:) i have 6 goose down pillows and 2 goose down comforters in our house, one of which is king size:)

Shannon

I thought of you Monday evening... I was walking up the driveway when I heard a goose squawk. Nothing new, we have about 50 of them that live/stay/whatever about 2 miles away... But then, I hear a "flap,flap" and another odd noise and I duck, look up, and this dang goose is right above my head!!!!! He flew away, but he scared the beejeezus out of me!

Heather

You're so mean.

That poor little goose, looking so sweet and innocent on her nest of adorable little goose-eggs.

I am kidding, just so you know. I don't share your hatred, but I do understand it.

We had one of those concrete geese on our porch when I was a kid. My mom would dress it up according to the seasons. 'Til some rotten teenager broke it into a million pieces.

Hey, you live in Ohio. It coulda been you!

I'm telling...

kel

I kinda like geese...(ducking and covering my head) Ow! Quit it!! That hurts, Cammie!!

jeana

Love the post! Nearly spit my tea all over my monitor from laughing!

E @ Scottsville

Okay, but my goose "Goober" was soooo sweet! He'd have made you love geese. He'd run to me when I called him, NEVER pecked at me, and even would hug me with his long neck. I'd raised him from a hatchling though --- so I must've done something right. =0)

Sarah

LOL!

Dani

Drop on by the Daily Drop on this coming Tuesday- I'll have an award waiting for you then. :)

Domestically Disabled Girl

Stupid geese. I agree totally. Give me a pillow rather than goose crap any day.
P.S. Thought of driving a different car, putting on a mask, THEN kick the goose at work and drive away fast? I'll be your getaway.

The Rambler

:shaking head:

Don't taunt the goose. They will find us and destroy any sanity a mother has left.

Shhhhhh...I think I hear something.

Signed,

A fellow bird hater/loather/scared completely out of her mind.

glenna

Thanks for stopping by my blog. Glad I found you thru SITS. I love your Goose post!!

Megan

So Cammie. How 'bout you tell us how you *really* feel about geese. ;0P

Tooj

I'm going to have to go back and read how you lost an ipod to one. That really can't be serious....right? Wait...it IS Cammie and I feel as if I already know you.

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