Dear So and So

I have been out of the Dear So and So loop for a few weeks but I feel the need to address some issues this week so here you go!!

Dear Bronchitis. Suck It.
Love, My Lungs

Dear Steroids, I'm not sure if I like you or hate you. You ARE helping my cough, and you have killed my appetite which is a bonus on week 1 of weight watchers, however you are irritating the hell out of the back of my throat. I'm kind of glad our relationship is half over.
Cough Cough, Cammie

My Dearest Vampire Diaries,
I heart you so much. You have have filled part of the whole in my heart that has been empty waiting on New Moon to come out. I love your cast, I love evil vampire Damon's hotness and I love that you remind me of Twilight. Please don't get cancelled.
A new fan, Cammie

Dear Kat, No way do I feel like I am cheating on Edward. He is still and always will be my number 1 favorite vampire EVAH. I love him long time. But you know how the saying goes....When The Vampire Cat is Away The human Mouse will play.
Your Friend, Cammie Cullen

For more Dear So and So goodness stop by and link up with Kat. And I will get to those questions on Monday!

Dear So and So

Another Friday, another list of things that just need to be said. HAPPY FRIDAY!! Before I get into berating people places and things I need to note....THIS is my 198th post. How in the HECK did that happen? If you missed my 100th you can find it HERE. I don't so much think I will be shooting for 200 things about me OR 200 comments. Perhaps I will just let it slide on by. Maybe I will do a give a way, maybe I will just ask for presents. Anyone want to sponser a giveaway? Anyone? Bueller?

Dear eBay Seller,
Hi, I'm Cammie. You may note by my 100s of positive feed backs that I have been around the eBay block a few times. I love me some eBay. Last week when I bought 3 pairs of size 5 navy shorts off of you for my son's new school uniform I was super excited to be getting them for $6. I was NOT however super excited to see you charge me $10.95 to ship them. Really? $10.95 for 3 pairs of little boy shorts? Did you forget to take the lead pipes out of the pockets? Now I will take a tiny bit of blame for not paying attention to the shipping cost but never have I paid that much for shipping so I just did not think to pay attention. Imagine my further surprise when I found out that you were NOT shipping from Europe which could have been the ONLY reason for such a high cost. I also find it amusing that when I called you out on it you refunded my money without further discussion. Chicken.
My feedback is higher than yours,
Cammie

Dear Chipolte,
Oh how I love your Mexican goodness. You rice is always perfected with just enough lime and cilantro, your chips just enough salt...but better than that is your sour cream. No other Mexican restaurant can perfect your sour cream which has a constancy like no other. How DO you make your sour cream that it does not just plop in the middle of my chicken fajita bowl but oozes off of the spoon to spread nicely across the top. I'm honestly not sure I want to know but I thank you Chipotle and shall forever remain....
A Loyal Customer

Dear Nintendo,
I love my Wii. I love that I can download old school games such as Super Mario Brothers and Punch-Out onto my Wii console. In fact I love it so much I may end up sending you the bill when I get carpal tunnel. Please....for the love of all that is holy.....give me Super Pitfall!! That is WAY cooler than some of the random crap that I can find. I promise to still feed my children if you give me Super Pitfall.
Yours until my hands go numb,
Cammie

Dearest Mallory,
Mommy loves you so very much. I'm not a huge fan of sharing my bed with you for half of the night. Let's be honest....most of the time I'm not even fond of sharing it with your daddy. I realize that I am SO lucky that you were night potty trained within weeks of being day trained but did you REALLY have to choose my bed for your first accident? That was your gimme. Do it again and we may have to press the issue of you sleeping in YOUR bed. Trust me, I look forward to that battle less than you do.
Love,
Mommy

Dear Punk Ass Kid In Swim Class,
So I hear from your big brother who was sitting next to me that you got kicked out of pre-school. LE GASP!! Really??? With such behavior such as spitting water in kids faces I would never have guessed. You really are a cute kid but I'm going to need you to stay away from my kid. And yes he IS that gullible that when you told him your name was scarface last night he proceeded to call you that throughout the class.
Don't Make Me Drown You,
Pierce's Mommy

Dear Rambler,
I told you so.
Cammie Cullen

And Finally... To My Darling Husband,
I survived the week with you out of town. Barely. I hate when you leave and I sleep like crap just WAITING for someone to come and kill me. It did not help that the damn cat would "knock" on the door in the middle of the night. You get home tonight. My scrapbook stuff is packed and by the door. Don't call.
With All My Love,
Your Wife.

Dear So and So.....Vacation Edition

On my last full day of soaking up sunshine in beautiful Holden Beach, NC I thought I would take the time to address the many people/things that made this visit awesome....as well as a few random things that I have waiting for me back home

Want to play along? Go link up with Kat. She is cool for a variety of reasons and her husband just got a promotion in the military so she doubly deserves a shout-out this week

Dear Holden Beach,
I heart you. I truly do. You have given us awesome weather this week....the water has been awesome too. Mallory does ask me to pass on a little message for her but please note....this reflects nothing on my love for you.....Mallory would like you to know that your constant waves in, waves out drama really sucks. She thinks you are scary and would appreciate you keeping the movement to a minimum next year. Pierce also asked me to pass along that he had an AWESOME time riding the boogie board and jumping your waves. Many thanks for wearing him out every single day
Until Next Year,
Cammie

Dearest 6AM,
I cannot tell you how awesome it has been not to see you one time this week. Apparently the secret to forever leaving The House of No Sleep is to move to the beach and play in the ocean every day. I don't mean to be a bitch, but I really don't like you 6AM....
See You Next Week,
Cammie

Dear Pierce and Mallory,
Mommy hopes that you had an awesome time this week. We tried new things (putt putt for you sissy, sleeping till 8 for both of you)and you pretty much behaved ALL WEEK. Pierce, you seem to have picked up that nothing really all that exciting goes on between the hours of 6AM and 8AM....what are the chances of you keeping this up when we get home? Maybe just on weekends? No? Suck. Mallory my beach hating princess.....I'm so glad that on your LAST FLIPPING DAY HERE you decided to accompany me down to the "wet sand". You let me hold you at the very edge of the water let the water get your toe toes. Next year let's try and get your knees wet. Please keep the fighting to a minimum on day one of our drive home tomorrow. Mommy does not want to have to break out the duck tape.
Love, Mommy

Dear Self,
Way to be a dumbass and decide that you don't need the camera on your last day here. Suuuuuure, we don't need the camera on the last day because you have taken hundreds of pics down at the beach this week. We did not need to capture that last day. The one wear Mallory actually let the water touch her, the one where we dug a HUGE puddle for the kids to play in....the one wwhere we caught some tiny little fish and put them in that puddle making Mallory bust out "The Sissy Squeal" which is one of my favorite sounds. Good job slacker.
Smacking Myself In the Head,
Cammie

Dear Betty's Waterfront Restaurant,
Oh how I love you. Thank you so much for the 5lbs you helped me gain in one meal. I love that your signature dish is a pound and a half of really BIG crab legs. I love feeling like a messy disgusting pig as I suck down every last bite dipped in butter....I will send you the bill for my stint placement.
Forever Your Biggest Fan
Cammie

Dear Makeup, hair product and on occasion bra and panties,
Thanks for taking a back seat in my life this week. I love beach living that even WITHOUT you I'm still prettier than some of the other people making bad fashion choices down here. I loved lounging around the beach house and on the deck with the neighbors having NO clue that I was flaunting my girly business under my cover up. Being as I DO have to go back to work on Monday we will be reacquainted soon. My co-workers will appreciate it.
Enjoying the Breeze,
Cammie

Dear Tivo,
Sweet Lord how we have missed you. Growing up in these times my children do not realize that when WE were little we had to put up with what was on, when it was on...not to mention that whole "change the channel with pliers once the knob fell off" deal. This week we were forced to endure constant episodes of Oswald and Pinky Dinky Do before it was time to head down to the beach on top of listening to Mallory bitch about wanting to watch Diego or Mickey Mouse. These kids would not have lasted 5 seconds in the 80s
Missing You,
TV Whore and Whore-lets

Dear 4 bottles of wine I picked up, the 4 more I will pick up in Mt Airy tomorrow and the bottle of bloody mary mix Joe the alcohol fairy brought while I was napping,
I love you, Let's make out when we get home
Yours Till My Liver Falls Out
Cammie

Dear So and So

I almost forgot that it was the day to send out my hate mail love notes to all who have blessed me this past week. If you want to play along head on over to Kat's place and link up.

Dear Kat,

I heart you, I heart your blog. But I hate you just a tiny bit right now for being too busy to blog because you are "roaming the English countryside" rub it in why don't you,
Love, Jealous in Ohio

Dear Joe,
I don't feel good today and I'm trying to keep this in mind when I find myself being annoyed at you calling me 18 times today while trying to get stuff ready to leave after work. Really though, you needed my advice on a swim suit for Pierce? You are there, I am at work, make a decision and move on

Love, your cranky wife

Dear Sister In Law,
Thanks for pissing Joe off on father's day. You pissed off one sister on Halloween so I am guessing that 4th of July goes to the last sister. For what it's worth, Joe does not get THAT angry all that often and you made him wreck the car in the garage pissed and that takes a lot.
Hating Drama That I Do Not Cause, Cammie

Dear Kallie the Cat,
I love that you have started to sleep with us. I'm not sure you realize just how lucky you are that Scarlet allows this. However, if you continue to kneed my stomach for 20 minutes to make what is already squishy fit your comfort needs I will send you down to Florida to make friends with the serial cat killer.

Love, Mommy

My Darling Mallory,
I know you are scared of thunder storms but I promise they will NOT kill you. Kindly remove yourself from my ass

Love, Mommy

Dear Michael Jackson,
While you did get a bit strange over the years, I will always remember that Thriller was the first video I ever saw on MTV. You are an icon of my childhood and your death will be the Elvis of my generation

Rest In Piece, Cammie

Dear HTML,
Typing you out gets on my nerves. which explains the lack of consistency between paragraphs on this post. This is me not caring.
Love Cammie