Wednesday, January 28, 2009

EFF YOU SNOW

This day is starting out to be a big ole bag of suck. I woke up this morning and before I even looked outside I could hear the ice. Super....with hope in my heart I called my company's weather line thinking maybe.....just maybe....we would be closed. Not so much. 2 hour delay. Meanwhile I look at all the other closings on the TV and laugh at the irony that while the Air National Guard does not have to report to work, I do.


I get showered, get the kids up and dressed and leave for work in plenty of time to get the kids to daycare and me to work using my normal "there is snow on the ground" pace of about 20mph.
Yes, that's right....I'm one of THOSE assholes.
While sitting at a red light I go to update my facebook status to something bitchy when I see a co-worker has posted that work is closed. WTF?? I call my boss who confirms that yes indeed, we ARE closed now. While I am truly pleased at this development I would have been even MORE pleased had this been decided....oh a few hours earlier.

On my way back home I realize we will have to stop at the store for milk and wine and I have Helpy McHelperson in the back seat going "Wow Mommy, this is a different day....I have never had breakfast BEFORE school (hey, they feed my kids there) and I have never had to turn around and go back home before"

Little did I know the fun had yet to begin. The driveway has not been shoveled....slid down this morning on my way out. Saying a prayer I hit the gas pedal to see if maybe I would get lucky and coast right up my (uphill) driveway. Wrong again. I get out of the car....do some half ass shoveling to find a nice sheet of ice about 2 inches thick under the snow. SURPRISE!! I go to find the salt container thingy and guess what.....EMPTY. SURPRISE.

I try to break it up as much as I can and get back in the car. Helpy McHelperson and his sister Mouthy McBrat are telling me that I am not doing a good job getting into the garage. Thanks guys, get out and push.

I will be victorious over the driveway. I will. Looking around the garage for something to help me get some traction I see the light.....in the form of a bag of bird seed.

Half a bag later I am THIS close to getting into the garage....cussing in front of my kids (mother of the year) I hit it one last time and barely avoid putting the car into the living room.

The kids cheer.

We are now all back in our jammies. I have already threatened the kids with taking them to school if they don't behave.

Snow and Ice..... Kiss my ass.

30 people fed my need for attention:

Hey Mama where's my...

Don't mean to laught "at" you but that is friggin hilarious! I am laughing "with" you, come on...LAUGH!! I don't think 10am is too early for you to have a glass of wine, it sounds like you deserve it! :0)

Shannon

I too hate it!! That's funny about the wine!! I slid across a few bridges this morning. The Beast does wonderful ice skating. I did a half turn without even trying.

jeana

Oh how I love you!!!!

XOXOXO

PS I'm with you how early is too early to start drinking?

Me

You are a woman after my own heart! Lets hope that the rest of the day runs a bit smoother!

WillowLakeScents

I feel your pain, lol. I had to get out of my nice warm bed @ 4:30 this morning to drive my dear husband to work because "my" car is better in the snow than "his" car. Let me just tell you that "NO" car is good when there are 5 inches of snow & ice & the roads HAVE NOT been plowed yet ! Wanna share your wine ???

Kristina P.

I hate the snow!! I wish we had work cancelled more often. Boo.

rychelle

that pic is HILLARIOUS!

i'll be thinking of you while i'm in san diego. 74...76...73...74...
;)

Megan

Ugh! Snow is one thing, ice is another! Sucky! Glad you made it home in one piece...and the kids too. *snicker*

Bee and Rose

hee hee hee hee...I am no longer wishing for snow here in AZ...When I lived over in Springboro (near Dayton), I had a day just like you are having...shortly after that I was back in warm sunny AZ....you can come stay here if ya want...

You really, really, really, need to get a book proposal going! You are flippin heee-larious!

I love that picture!!!!

Jenny and the Princess Peonies

Oh my! I love that picture. My sentiments exactly!

Good luck!

Becky

I feel your pain, believe me I do....

Lynette

I hate snow, I hate cold, I hate winter, I likey you!! Great, funny post!!

Stay warm and dry!!

Laura

I'm going to keep my mouth shut about the "sneaux."

Kristen

Hope you have a better day now that you are inside in your pjs!

Yaya

OMG!

A) Love that you were about to update your facebook status at a red light!

B) Love that you "had" to stop for wine!

C) Love that the little naggers were giving you their opinion on everything!

D) Love that picture!!!!!!

Jim Brochowski

OMG - Such a great descriptive post. Almost like a movie short. Too funny.

Had to stop for milk & wine. I thought I had to re-read that to be sure I saw it right. Classic!

Thanks for another good laugh. You have quite a talent. Maybe you should be a screen writer, or at least write for a sitcom.

Sarah

Oh Cammie! At least they cancelled work, right?

Your kids crack me up!

I'd be one of THOSE people, too.

Hey Mama where's my...

I don't know who started that blog...I but she is one cool kid~ hehehe

Melissa

I still don't get your dislike for snow?
You need to embrace the beauty of it :P

Seriously. So your morning went to poo. Hope you're snuggled under warm blankets with a glass of wine.

Rachel Ann

Thank you for stopping by on my SITS day last week...I love all the comments and felt very appreciated. Sorry it has taken me so long to share bloggy love back!

I was in the same boat a few weeks ago with snow and ice...sucks! LOVE, absolutely LOVE the picture!

heather@it'stwinsanity

Loving that picture!

Bee and Rose

Hey Cammie! I left a blurb on my blog about the book blog today (Thursday...) Put some linkies in it too:)

Hope you're thawing out back there!

The Davis Family

Hey!! I just started reading your blog and you are so funny!! You really brightened up my day!! Fortunatley, i live in the south. We dont get snow or ice much. We did get 3 inches before Christmas. You would've thought that the world was ending. Schools closed, stores ran outta water and can foods. I mean, dam!! Its not like the world will stop for 3 inches of freggin snow!! Anyway, thanks for making me laugh!!

Kami

Oh my word, I can't stop laughing! We are soul sister Cammie, honest, this would be me...Helpy McHelperson and Mouthy McBrat! Love it!

I hope today is better. Up here in the Arctic we get the snow but not the ice...Ice is evil!

Ps I tagged you, cause I am nice like that! No pressure though :)

Cheryl

Man that's some snow and ice and a cool freakin' snow sculpture! I hate to tell you that I am from Ohio and currently living all the way over in the United Arab Emirates where we are enjoy sunny weather in the 70s!! ;) BUT come summer here, we'll be the ones who are royally screwed.

Fun blog! Love the name. I'll be back.

Juls

...glad you all survived! That's hilarious!!

bernthis

LOL- I'm sorry but the images were hilarious and I love that picture of the F you snow sculpture.

Don't you just love what great help small kids can be at a time when you just want to rip your hair out?

E

Oh my goodness,I was LAUGHING! I love the kids "nicknames" and can't imagine the ordeal of getting up your driveway! I'm from Texas and we don't HAVE those kinds of problems. I just hit deer way too often!

Enjoyed your blog immensly!

Heather

Who is Melissa and why does she think you should embrace the snow?

Does she not realize that snow is F#*()_)*& cold? And sucks?!

What the heck?!

Hey, isn't she going on your girls getaway with you?

Hope you're not going to Alaska.

I hate winter, too. Let's move down to Georgia. Or Texas.

Drama queens mum

That is such a cute ice sculpture. I am sick of snow & ice too. We had a snowstorm on Wed night & had no internet or phone till tonight. So I'm catching up on blogs now.

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