Another cartoon that makes me want to claw my eyes out

I must apologize to those of you who were not expecting to come here and cry out of sweetness instead of laughter. I do have a soul, every now and then it pushes it's way out. Have no fear though, I have pushed that part down for at least a good few weeks. I now return you to your regularly scheduled sarcasm.

Last month I told you about These guys....and how much they drive me nuts. I have to say SORRY to my sister in law Gina because I do know that THESE guys allow her much time to clean, do laundry, ect and I do love my sweet nephew a lot and he pretty much lives for them---so I will give them a reprieve and instead tell you about another show that makes me want to drown myself in Merlot.

mmmmm, Merlot.

oops, got distracted. okay. Let's talk about Max and Ruby. You know them? Good. If not.....let me tell you about them.

This is Max and Ruby. They are brother and sister. Who apparently have no parents. This is the first thing that bugs me about them. Where in the hell are their mom and dad?? I have seen a big old family picture of them on the wall but parents are no where to be found. Hello, Child Protective Services? They do have a grandma who lives up the street but I don't think she would be much help in case of emergency.

Ruby.....big sister Ruby. I kind of want to punch her in the face. Apparently since she is in charge in the house with no parents she has to kick "bossy big sister" to an entirely new level. All she does for 30 minutes is bitch at Max about what he is doing, not doing, supposed to be doing or already did. Really Ruby....since you are already in charge of bathing your brother with no parents around will it really kill you to let him eat ice cream in the tub? And please, get your ass OUT of his sandbox when he wants to play in it. It is NOT you and your equally annoying friend Louise's personal beach. Ruby is in charge of grocery shopping and feeding her brother. In my house that means Pierce would be feeding Mallory pop tarts 3 times a day.

Max----USE YOUR WORDS. While he is fairly cute in a mischievous sort of way his use of ONE WORD over and over in the same episode tap dances on my last nerve. Maybe if you TOLD your sister to piss off (don't forget to say please) she would leave you alone to play with your ROCKET. Yep....a ROCKET for a 3 year old.

Thankfully my monkeys have moved past their love for Max and Ruby...they have since given me other shows to hate but I will save those for another day. Yes, I know I could turn the T.V. off but every now and then I like to do things like go to the bathroom alone or refill my wine glass.

on an unrelated note.....which one of you can tell me how to make a link with more than one word...I know to post the link and highlight it and then retype what you want it to say but as soon as you hit the space bar for another word it no longer links it.

Paging Dr. Mommy.....

**Warning--the following post is sarcasm free**

As much as I like to grumble and complain about my lack of sleep, sharing a bed with a 23lb terror and ultimately getting up at dark o clock, every now and then my kids throw in a moment that reminds me how worth it it all is.

Last night was one of those nights.

Last night after we put the kids to bed I was all wrapped up in my Snuggie waiting on the MOST DEPRESSING HOUSE EPISODE EVER to start (okay, most depressing since cutthroat bitch died). I heard the sound of small feet that were not in bed and then Joe saying "ohh, buddy, what is wrong??"

Pierce has a few different cries. There is the "I am mad that I can't have my way" cry the "I know I am in trouble" cry, and then there is the "my heart is broken" cry. This is the one that gets me--that one comes with HUGE brown eyes that are full of tears, a mouth that is turned into the saddest frown....THIS cry breaks MY heart.

This is the cry that came downstairs last night with his stuffed EVE (from Wall-E) doll in one hand and one of her arms in the other. His EVE doll has had movable arms and somehow he managed to pull one off. Pierce has a habit of spinning his stuffed toys around by their arms/legs/ears and I keep telling him that one day this would happen (MAN mommies are smart)

I promised him that I would fix it. I told him that Dr Mommy would do surgery on EVE to re-attach her arm. I told him that it may take awhile but that I would bring her up and tuck her back in with him when I was finished.

I am not sew much a seamstress (did you like that humor?) I can do buttons, I can sew a hole, but I have never reattached an arm to a toy....an arm that has to somehow get the part that makes it move back INTO the hold and then sewn around it. Awesome.

I got out my little sewing kit surgical tools and sat down to make my baby's night all better. It did not take me long to realize that EVE's arm was not going to be able to move once I got it back on (hey, don't judge...I'm lucky I did not sew her to the couch) but I knew I would be able to at least get it back on so that no stuffing came out. I sewed the patients arm back in place and while it would not move I did a pretty darn good job on it thankyouverymuch.

Once the patient was out of recovery I took her upstairs to Pierce. I thought he would be asleep but once I opened the door he rolled over and sat up. Once he saw that EVE's arm was back in place he smiled at me. He was okay with the fact that her arm could not move. (Thank you God).

I was rewarded with the BEST hug, a beautiful smile, bright shiny brown eyes and a "thank you mommy"

Most of all I was rewarded with the fact that Mommy can *almost* always make everything better.

These moments are what makes Life in the House of No Sleep.....totally worth it.

Being Mommy is the best super power there is.

Hello to all of the Blog Stalkers and my NKOTB recap

So I am the top blog over at Blog Stalkers Unite this week. HELLO!!!! If you have never been here before welcome....a little warning.....I sometimes use dirty words and make fun of people, places and things....other than that I am pretty cool!! I have an awesome husband and 2 kids that prevent me from sleeping.....they are 5 and almost 3. Here are some of the best of the best.....or the worst of the worst....you pick!

TheTaleoftheDragonandtheQueen or why I hate geese

I get cranky when you don't say my name correctly

I used to be cool

I hate winter

Mommies gone wild

Give your period the respect that it deserves

pee standing up. you know you want to

And for those of you who already know me.......let me just say.....BEST. NIGHT. EVER. Sorry to have left you all Hanging (Tough <----like that New Kids humor) but alas I did not run away with Joey McIntyre this weekend. Though not for lack of desire trust me. My husband dropped me and BFF Jess of at the bar to meet BFF Liz and our awesome DD Paul.....we drank until the show started. Okay, and during. When those lights went out and those HOT HOT guys (except for 2 of them) came up out of that stage I thought I was going to pee my pants. They are AWESOME!!!! 20,000 screaming women.....I took some video but you can hardly hear it because of all of the screaming. My voice is shot to hell today and I think I am still hungover but it was one of the best times I have ever had!

The average age was probably early 30s.....some girls came out in New Kids shirts (my favorite was the pregnant chick with her shirt all tight around her baby bump) some girls had HUGE buttons, some had signs. It was INSANE.

If they come your way and you loved them back then....you will love them 100 times more now! I totally wanted to stalk their hotel room like the 90210 kids did for Color Me Badd.

When DD Paul dropped me off at my house I spent 5 minutes trying to get my key in the door only to hear later that Joe left the door unlocked for me. Yeah vodka!!

Sorry I don't have pics.....they are on facebook and I cant get on there from work.

I love to be on top!!

That get your attention? Okay, I will get my NKOTB update up tomorrow but I needed to get this out here first.....

I am the TOP BLOG this week over at BlogStalkersUnite --If you get here from there before I get a real post up on Monday....come back! I'm going to link up my favorite posts.....and yes, get my concert review up....

Let's just say it was one of the best nights EVER!!!!

Until tomorrow.....

Today is the day.....13 year old Cammie finally lives her dream......

First let's go back........the year is 1988.....the scene....my bedroom. My bangs are teased high, my eye-shadow is blue. My jeans are tight rolled and my Eastlands have the laces wound into those little springs. I'm wearing Debbie Gibson Electric Youth perfume. That's right....Debbie Gibson....not Deborah like she goes by now.


My clock radio is on and across the room my boombox has a tape in, the record button pressed. I am silent because that is truly the only way to get a good recording of the song.

My little sister busts in the door and ruins it. All you can hear in the middle of the song is me shushing her and telling her to get out of my room.


The song......honestly I don't remember the exact song but the group is the New Kids on the Block. They rule my world. Their posters all over my room. Someday I will meet Joey McIntyre and run away with him.


I never got to go to a New Kids concert. I know......hard knock life.

Today--The scene......My kitchen. Kids demanding their pop tarts. I no longer have bangs but I do rock my mom cut. Sometimes my eye shadow is still blue thanks to MAC makeup and my jeans....well they are just tight.


Tonight......tonight I am going to see the New Kids on the Block. My husband will drop me off downtown in my mini van and I will realize my dream! Along with BFF Liz , BFF Jess and hundreds of other screaming women in their 30's I will sing Hangin Tough, Please Don't Go Girl, and I'll Be Loving You Forever. Oh yes, I will sing.....I will dance.....I might even cry tears of joy.

I was always a Joey McIntyre girl. Remember him....the sweet baby faced Joey? How I loved him.


In fact I MET him a few years ago. Next to the births of my children and my wedding day it is one of the best days EVER. Remember he was in a little show called Dancing With the Stars? Well he came with the tour and my mom won tickets (give me some credit, I did not buy THOSE tickets) and I waited in line like a giddy school girl to get his autograph and hear him speak my name. I touched him. I HAD a picture on my cell phone but the Joe I MARRIED did not hit the damn save button and by the time I realized it we were already home. He almost died that night.

Joey looks like THIS now. Still hot in my eyes.

I cannot wait to hear him sing Please Don't Go Girl. Because I never did go....I have held on to my love for the New Kids over the past 20 years. I knew they would come back....all grown up and hot (well, most of them) and now they sing about doing dirty things.....not just about crushes and first kisses. Mmmmmm. Oops, sorry.

I'm having a hard time concentrating today. Maybe because I have the New Kids blaring in my ears through my iPod.

Oh yes.....today is a good day. Think of me tonight at 7PM......

Come on in and I will pour you a cup of random.....

Just some random thoughts from my brain this morning......

I think THIS is my new motto in life.

I woke up this morning and while putting on my make-up noticed that I now am sporting crow's feet. What. In. The. Hell. Those were NOT there yesterday. No seriously....I have never EVER seen crows feet in the corner of my eyes. I kind of want to stab myself IN said eyes with a fork.

Speaking of birds. I saw a dead goose on the side of the road this morning and it made me happy.

Wow, one MORE thought about birds......the happiest bird IN THE WORLD lives outside my bedroom window. He starts his merry little song around 4AM every day. Rain or Shine.

I need a BB Gun

This morning I had the following conversation with my 5 year old son when he came out of his room.....

"Wow mommy, you already dried your hair?"
"Yeah bud, did you not hear my blow dryer? That normally wakes you up"
"I know, I had my ears turned off"
"Turned off? Do you have a button that does that?
"Yep, it is behind my ears"
"hmmmm, that explains a lot"

I had some challenges getting off of the highway this morning. My friend called me apparently 2 cars back to tell me I almost killed the person behind me. Oops. She also said I ran a red light. I disagree. It was yellow. Maybe pink.

Tomorrow I am living a DREAM 20 years in the making. More on this later.....if you already know what I am doing tomorrow as I know some of you do (Liz, Mellisa, Lauren, Kelly I'm talking about YOU) or if you suspect.....keep it quiet until tomorrow.

I wrote this entire post without spelling one thing wrong. WHOA....I am SMRT

Not at all Wordless Wednesday

I have some very exciting news to share!! Some of you know that my husband Joe is in the Air force....he is what is called Active Guard Reserve which means he is full time active duty but we are lucky in that he is stationed where we live on a permanent basis. He is about 2 years away from retirement (which means he is 2 years away from getting a new career but more on that later)

What I want to shout from the rooftops is that he was just selected as the Honor Guard Manager of the YEAR for the NATION!!!!!!

This is an incredible award that he won out of all of the people who were selected from each state and I am SO proud of him!! He works so hard and is really deserving of this honor! In June we are off for a week to Washington D.C. compliments of the Air force (our first time away together without kids!) as part of being the award winner. We will be toured around the city and meet some (I am told) important people (I would LOVE to meet President Obama) and attend a lot of dinners.

I guess now he goes on to win for the entire Airforce or something like that which in my mind translates to "He is already Ms USA now he competes for Ms Universe"

So yeah to my husband who even though he never reads this still needed a big old shout out on my blog!

Stay tuned in a few months from now when I stress about leaving my kids for that long for the first time EVER and THEIR first time away from both parents at the same time.

Oh, and as far as him getting a new career.....some things he has tossed around.
-lunch lady at the kids school
-school bus driver....for the kids route
-greeter at Lowes
-golf course attendant

Awesome.