Yep. That's right. My New Years Resolution for 2010 is to gain more weight. I'm going to get Jerry Springer Show fat. I am not going to exercise one bit and my meals will all be fried and come with a side of cheese sauce. Expect to see me being cut out of my house on the Discovery Channel later this year.
Why such an awesome goal for this year? Why not the typical "I am going to lose weight and get in shape" goal that most of us make, and that I have made damn near every year since I graduated college?
Because I am smarter than myself. That's why. Each year I make that typical lose weight/eat better BS resolution. And each year I proceed to do the exact opposite. So since my SELF is so determined to outwit myself...you following me here? This year I'm going to fool myself into losing weight and working out by telling myself that I want to get fat(ter). Genius right? I don't know why mySELF did not come up with this years ago.
I've already started my trickery. Knowing that it is my goal to gain weight I went to the gym yesterday for a swim. Today I had a 190 calorie muffin for breakfast and got my starbucks in the non fat variety. So there self.
Who is with me here people?