Sally Hanson.....she IS your friend

Amy my dear, this post is for you.....since I know you looooooove woman with facial hair.

Dear Lord I needed to pour bleach in my eyes before I even made it to my desk this morning. I rode the elevator up this morning with 2 people who had fairly identical mustaches. One was a guy with some upper lip fuzz, one was a girl with some upper lip fuzz.

Now before I go any further let me explain. I am not talking about the peach fuzz that most of us women are inflicted with, the kind that can either be bleached into obscurity or removed with a quick strip of wax. I am talking full on STACHE.

It was like a train wreck I tell you. I could not help myself to NOT look. When I was telling my friend who sits next to me she is all, "I think I know who you mean, does she wear glasses?" I honestly could not tell her because I could not look away from the caterpillar sitting on her face.

Seriously....how can you NOT look at that and realize that as a woman you should not have that much hair on your upper lip. There is no possible way she does not see that she looks like a 70's porn star. I know it is genetic and all but they MAKE STUFF FOR THAT. Anyone who works here can afford a $5.99 box of THIS.

I would even be happy to share my brow lady if it means never having to see that again in the workplace.

Wal-Mart yes, work NO.

DO OVER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Yes class it is 8:33AM and I need to start all over. I get in my car this morning with my children in PLENTY of time to make it to work on time. This alone is reason to cheer. I glance down and remember THIS

Oh yeah, I need gas. No big deal, we pass a station right on the way to daycare. Off we go listening to the merry tunes of Veggie Tales singing about letting your light shine. We pull into the gas station, I reach into my bag and pull out my walletcant find my wallet. sigh. I must have left it at home. Which is annoying but not a HUGE deal since home is about 5 minutes away. I'm going to be a few minutes late to work.

Get home, dogs are going nuts, look around.....no wallet.

I'm going to be a little bit more late to work.

Call myself at work. Self does not pick up (duh) but co-worker does. "Hey co-worker, is my wallet on my desk? It is? Well that is just FANTASTIC because I need gas and don't have my debit card....I'm going to be a lota little bit late to work

Call Joe. This is his fault. Don't ask how, it just is. Yes, I DO realize how lucky he is to have me thankyouverymuch. Ask Joe where super secret gas card is hidden so that if I even make it back to the gas station I don't have to make out with the guy behind the counter (again) to get gas. I am going to be fairlylate to work.

Armed with the gas card I say a prayer that I make it to the gas station and fill up. I'm starting to get mildly annoyed at all the extra steps in my morning which is about the same time that Pierce decides to ask me questions like "How do you make wood?" and "Why are roofs called roofs?"

Get to day care and say a silent prayer that I keep my military ID (the one that allows me on base) in my car so that I don't have to go to the front gate and make out with the cop (again) to get in. Have I mentioned that I am going to be really late to work

Dropping Mallory off in her class is not a quick process. She does fine but I have to say good bye to her through the window when I pass her class to take Pierce to his, and AGAIN when I walk back out....the 2nd time involves kissy faces through the glass. Everyday.

Reminding myself not to speed as I do not have my license on me I head to work. By this point I am sweating like a hooker in confession and really just want to go back to bed. Get to work, and manage to wrangle up $.80 so that I do not have to make out with the girl at the cafeteria (again) for coffee. Seriously wish that I had something to spike said coffee with.

All in all I was only 20 minutes late to work.

Yeah Me

Goose Rage?

We all know about (or even suffer from) road rage. I know I have been guilty of spewing some not so nice words or flipping a finger on occasion. When I received the following news story from Heather I proceeded to, alternately giggle and then feeling bad for giggling. This man I believe suffers from Goose Rage. Not to be confused with Post Traumatic Goose Disorder which is what I am afflicted with.

Please read the following with a grain of salt...I will put some of my own thoughts in but I don't REALLY endorse cruelty to animals....yes, even geese, which I barely consider an animal.

In Warren County, a sheriff's deputy is under investigation for beating a Canada goose to death. oh, a dead goose....awesome my favorite kind

It was along Columbia Road in Deerfield Township where, at about 10 a.m.
Sunday, Lisa and Artie Kuhn spotted an injured Canada goose.

Lisa called 911, hoping to get the bird some help. what a good Samaritan, I probably would have ran it over to put it out of it's misery......what?? I'm just thinking of the goose

A Warren County sheriff's deputy responded, but the Kuhn family never expected what came next. can you hear the suspenseful music kicking in? What happens next, I have to know

"He raised his club up and began to beat it in front of me and my children and in front of people driving by with minivans full of children" said Lisa Kuhn. "I started screaming, Stop, you don't need to do that, he's not that badly injured!, and he would not relent." ohhhhh, SNAP. Way to kill my buzz here I was enjoying a tale of a soon to be dead goose and now it is ruined with actual animal cruelty.

"And he just kept on beating the goose," said Artie Kuhn, her husband. "And it didn't seem to do any good, so he stepped on his neck with his boot and strangled it, and he was holding his wings down with his club." have to admit....I snickered here just a bit....come on people PICTURE it....

All that's left now are a few feathers on the side of the road. seriously? This is a bit dramatic

Euthanizing a wounded animal is protocol for Warren County Sheriff's Deputies. and by euthanize they mean beat into a pile of feathers?

The Kuhn family is just asking whether there's a better way. They say some warning would've also been nice so their three-year-old didn't have to see the beating. way to pull the kid card, could you not have, ummm, I don't know....driven away?

"Blunt force trauma is what they call it to euthanize the animal ? and I want the policy to change, I want a written apology from him," said Lisa Kuhn. I'm sure this will be brought up at the next town hall meeting

The Warren County Sheriff's Office released a statement saying "the complaint regarding the deputy's actions is being investigated and there will be no further comment until the investigation is complete." or until they stop laughing

Wendy Carroll, who witnessed the incident, says she supports the officer. no, my name is not Wendy Carroll

"This isn't the area to shoot it, so he had to use something and he knew what he had to do and I believe that's what he did, said Carroll. so there

Thank you much Heather for the news story. I appreciate any and all opportunities to spread my hatred of geese through the blogging community!

Camping Recap

We had a most awesome time camping this past weekend! I was a bit nervous as to how her majesty would behave since she is not a fan of water, bugs or dirt but she had a wonderful time as well! I was SUPER annoyed to realize that I had forgotten my GOOD camera but I did have my other little camera in my purse so I was able to at least get SOME pics.

We had a bit of drama when we first arrived which proved (again) that wives are WAY smarter than husbands. I had been nagging Joe for months now to go and practice popping the camper up again prior to us actually taking it camping. In true man style he assured me that it would not be an issue. Guess what. It was an issue. He finally figured it out and we were able to get our mansion pop-up set up. I only made one comment like "Wow, maybe we should have practiced this earlier....just sayin"

I probably gained 10lbs over the course of the weekend thanks to really good dinners, and let's not forget the s'mores.....YUM. The kids swam (well, Pierce swam, Mallory allowed herself to get a little bit wet)and pretty much ran around that campground like they owned it. We were set up right across from the park so I was able to be mother of the year and sit my butt in a chair and read while I watched them play.

There was also a beach close by and we were thinking about visiting until I heard someone mention it was crowded with GEESE. I suspected there would be some close by....keeping their evil little goose eyes on me. Would you believe I can even toss a Twilight story into a camping story? While I was sitting outside of my mom's camper I heard the distinct sound that is "Bella's Lullaby" playing from the camper next door. I will admit that I hoped for one hot second that the Cullens were hunting camping next to us and my Edward was taking a piano break but alas....it was a woman with her iPod driving her spouse nuts to the tunes of the Twilight soundtrack. Ahhhh yes....Twilight fans are everywhere.....All in all I would give our weekend an A+. We don't get to go again until August due to vacations and Joe's work schedule but Pierce at least will get to go with my mom a few more times

Into The Wilderness I Go.....

First off I feel the need to apologize for the suck-age that was yesterday's post. I am in the middle of some sibling related family drama and was just not myself yesterday and probably should not have posted at all. I will do my best to keep you from such crap in the future.

So, this weekend is our first venture out into a really nice campground the wilderness. We will pitch our tent pop-up that we acquired earlier this year and live off of the land out of our mini fridge. We will eat what we catch steak, chicken and burgers and drink out of the river lots of wine and beer. We will try not to succumb to the elements turn on the a/c so we don't get hot.

It may come as a surprise to some of you that I am spending the weekend in such squalor. I am generally known to be kind of an indoor girl....however I do actually enjoy camping having made lots of childhood memories doing so. We are taking the dog...the one who hates you (don't be offended, she hates everyone) which should be a treat and sending the OTHER dog (the one who would like Charles Mansion) to puppy camp for the weekend. The kids will have a blast and if it storms I plan to head to the next site over and sleep in my mom's insanely large motor home. The one with the potty.

I may not be around bloggy-land this weekend, I may try and *gasp* go without my laptop....hope you all have a fantastic weekend!

BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

That was pretty much my opinion of Idol's ending last night.

I love Adam.....I know he will still be very successful and go far.

Kris is good, but Idol has already put out other winners with his style and I was hoping to see a new style. I will not decide to love him even though I have since been made aware that his wife is an AOII too.

Fergie was awesome, Kiss was awesome....Steve Martin.....along with that God awful song....not awesome.

I had much fun twittering during the show.....even though Patrice told me that I was old.....really, she did......uh huh......

What did you think?

I ♥ Faces

ohhh, my very first entry into the I ♥ Faces photo contest!! I have seen contest before and never really knew what it was all about. So, I did some snooping! This weeks contest is close up shots and I knew right away that I wanted to play. This picture is about a year old and I posted it last week in her bday post but I knew I wanted to use it again here!

Please see below for my original post for today!

"I am submitting this photo into the www.iheartfaces.com Blurb Book photo contest. I am granting I ♥ Faces permission to use my photo in a printed version of a book for commercial use and possibly advertising of a photo book on both the Blurb and I ♥ Faces web sites."